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Announcer (00:00:00): It's time to think about the Bible like you never have before. This is Christian Questions. After this episode, go to ChristianQuestions.com to check out other episodes, Bible study resources videos, download the CQ app and more. Today's topic is, "Does Patience Really Matter?" Coming up in this episode, to be patient is not easy or popular. Our digital social structure programs us to think, "I want it now and I should have it now!" For Christians this presents a problem, as the Bible teaches us several deep levels of patience. How do we become truly patient Christians in an impatient world? Here's Rick and Jonathan.

Rick (00:00:40): Welcome everyone. I'm Rick. I'm joined by Jonathan, my cohost for over 25 years. Jonathan, what's our theme scripture for this episode?

Jonathan (00:00:49): Ephesians 4:1-2: "Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love."

Rick (00:01:06): Patience is one of the most understated yet powerful characteristic any human being can have. Most of us think of patience as simply waiting things out. It's raining and we can't start the game until it stops. So let's be patient. While this is a true facet of patience, biblical patience goes much further than that. The Bible teaches us the kind of patience one needs when one is going through a hard and perhaps painful experience. This kind of patience adds a factor of endurance to the necessary waiting, as one needs to bear a burden or discomfort for a time. Interestingly, the New Testament adds yet another dimension to the kind of patience we as Christians are supposed to have. As we shall soon see, this third kind of patience is all about self-restraint. So the question is, am I personally and truly living a life of Christ-like patience?

Jonathan (00:02:04): The Miriam Webster Dictionary actually shows us all of these various aspects of patience: "bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint; manifesting forbearance under provocation or strain; not hasty or impetuous; steadfast despite opposition, difficulty or adversity." And lastly, "able or willing to bear."

Rick (00:02:30): So that third definition, "not hasty or impetuous," that's really the first definition, the most basic that we talked about. The first definition about bearing pains or trials calmly, that's that second, perseverance. And the second one, manifesting forbearance, that's the one we're going to really focus in on. So let's define New Testament patience by going from the most basic to the most challenging aspects of patience. First, our first approach to patience is to be appropriate, to not be reactive. And this is a really good example for parenting.

Jonathan (00:03:07): The word is defined as "appropriate, that is, by implication, mild." God's patience is the highest model for our patience. James 3:17: "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy."

Rick (00:03:31): So the word in that verse, "gentle," "first pure, then peaceable, then gentle..." This is the wisdom of God. That's the word for "appropriate," for not running ahead. So God has this gentleness, this appropriateness in His example, and that's what we're supposed to have. So let's look at how it gets applied. Those who are to lead the flock are to have this kind of patience as opposed to being one who adds to trouble. Let's look at 1 Timothy 3:3:

Jonathan (00:04:01): "Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous..." It's interesting that "patient" is mentioned before the word "brawler." Someone who is patient is calm and quietly waits, while a brawler is one who is looking to pick a fight.

Rick (00:04:21): Yeah. And those who lead in Christianity should not be looking to pick a fight with anybody. And we really need to see this basic level of patience is very, very, very important. All true Christians should have a patience that can be readily observed. Now this, this is a real test. Listen to this. Philippians 4:4-7:

Jonathan (00:04:44): "Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice! Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Rick (00:05:07): So Jonathan, when you read verse 5, "let your gentle spirit be known to all men.," that's that word for appropriateness, that patience, let it be known to all men. People should look at us and see that in us. That's what the apostle is telling to the Philippian Christians. This should be shining out of you--our evenness, our appropriateness. This kind of patience depends on our continual resetting of what we allow our minds to dwell on. What am I allowing my mind to dwell on? Am I looking toward that appropriateness in all aspects of life? So we look at this first aspect of patience, this appropriateness, and what do we have? It's the powerful process of patience. What? What is it?

Jonathan (00:05:58): The most basic biblical definition of patience is to wait with calm intention. This is a necessary foundation for everything else that true Christian patience will require of us.

Rick (00:06:10): So here's the question: Am I equipped to intentionally wait in this fashion, or do I fall into the restless wondering and wandering of my own human emotions? Am I equipped for this intentionality in waiting, or am I just wondering and wandering and kind of going with how I feel? That's really the question with this very basic appropriateness kind of patience.

Jonathan (00:06:39): The next New Testament approach to patience is the most common. It is a deep, sound, and powerful endurance. "Patience" in the noun form means "cheerful or hopeful endurance; constancy." Jesus teaches us that this kind of patience is broad and absolutely necessary for discipleship. Luke 21:19: "In your patience possess ye your souls." Now this is a big statement. Jesus is saying, "In your endurance possess ye your souls. Endure through your trials. Observe how I prove my loyalty to my Father and do the same."

Rick (00:07:19): That is a big statement. When you think Jesus is saying, we always talk about, Jesus says, "Love one another as I have loved you" and how important and powerful that is. But here he says, "In your endurance, possess ye your lives." So we have to see these levels of patience as something of great, great significance because Jesus is telling us that that's where they are. So Jonathan, we looked at the noun form of the word for patience this endurance. What's the verb form?

Jonathan (00:07:48): Well, it means "to stay under, behind; that is, remain; to undergo; that is, bear trials, have fortitude, persevere." James 5:11: "Behold, we count them happy which endure. You have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy."

Rick (00:08:11): Everybody who knows something about the Bible knows the phrase, "the patience of Job." Sometimes we don't know all that's behind it, but we all know the phrase. Well, here's where it comes from. You've heard of the patience of Job. It's in James 5:11, and it's a very significant description. The patience being defined here is a determination to remain in a difficult position, to cheerfully endure, and to have fortitude based upon your ability to continually remind yourself of your own deliberate purpose. That's a mouthful. We need to be able to cheerfully endure, have fortitude, and it's got to be based on our ability to remind ourselves of our deliberate purpose. This patience is really an extraordinary endurance. Just ask Job. It's an extraordinary endurance that finds its courage in a crystal-clear mental picture of its expectations. What are we thinking about? Do I have a crystal-clear mental picture of what I expect through experiences? If I do, I can have this kind of endurance.

Jonathan (00:09:26): Remember Job said in Job 13:15, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him." That shows the endurance and fortitude he had.

Rick (00:09:37): And his patience was tested. He had his three "comforters" who kept telling him, "Look, Job, you messed up, you messed up, you messed up." And he said, "No, no, no, no." He understood that he just needed to wait through, and the burden was massive. The burden was almost unbearable. And yet he shows us how to bear that. It's really a great, great example. Another great example of this kind of patient endurance was the Hebrew Christians. They were sterling examples of this endurance that we're talking about with Job. It uses this same New Testament word. Let's look at Hebrews 10:32-36. We'll stop, we'll pause at the end of verse 34:

Jonathan (00:10:22): "But remember the former days, when, after being enlightened, you endured a great conflict of sufferings, partly by being made a public spectacle through reproaches and tribulations, and partly by becoming sharers with those who were so treated. For you showed sympathy to the prisoners and accepted joyfully the seizure of your property, knowing that you have for yourselves a better possession and a lasting one." Wow, what a great example. Look at how they stood up for those who were persecuted. They lost everything for the sake of Christ.

Rick (00:10:59): And you notice how verse 32 started, "...remember in the former days when after being enlightened, you endured..." So this was not a trial of endurance that came to very, very mature Christians. This is a trial of endurance that came to relatively new Christians--after being enlightened, you endured and you endured hardship, the seizing of your property, persecution and the apostle's saying you really stood for Christ, with Christ. Having seen that, now we have verses 35-36 of Hebrews 10:

Jonathan (00:11:35): "Therefore, do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised."

Rick (00:11:46): So he's saying, alright, you were there and it was hard and you got through that. But don't throw away the confidence in God now because it might be a little bit easier. You have still need of endurance, of that perseverance that holds up, that kind of patience that bears that burden without knowing when it's going to end, so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what's promised. And Jonathan, that's one of the directions for every one of us as Christians. We need to put it in perspective, always put it in perspective. So we're looking at the fortitude kind of patience here. So what is the powerful process of patience regarding fortitude?

Jonathan (00:12:31): Waiting with calm intention lays the groundwork for a much deeper level of patience. It is perseverance. It is waiting with calm intention while bearing a painful or trying burden. This kind of patience is only developed through the challenging experiences of life. The deeper our development of this perseverance, the more we become like Jesus.

Rick (00:12:56): I like that. The deeper we develop this, the more Christ-like we can become. So here's the question. Here's the question; am I focused? Am I focused in on becoming Christ-like by persevering through my trials? Or do I easily lose my objectivity due to the severity of my experiences? Does the severity of my experiences knock me off center and make me lose that focus so I'm not in enduring as I could, as I should, as a follower of Jesus? The next time we hear someone say, "just be patient," we need to pause and consider how Jesus would handle our experience.

Jonathan (00:13:39): With intentional waiting and the perseverance of bearing difficulties are necessary kinds of patience, what could be missing?

Rick (00:13:48): Biblically defined patience focuses us on managing our way through long periods of unsettled life experiences. The two aspects of patience we have thus far discussed show us primarily how to manage things that come to us from the outside world. Now, our next aspect of patience really focuses us on appropriately handling things that require restraint from the inside out. So we've been looking, the first two kinds of patience were really things coming to us from the outside in. Now we're going to focus in on patience from the inside out.

Jonathan (00:14:30): Okay, here's the third aspect of patience. And interestingly, it is part of the fruit of the spirit. Let's look at Galatians 5:22-23: "But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law." Focusing on the fruit of patience; this is a newly developed discipline based on selfless love and spiritual things. Now, this is the noun form of "patience," which means "longanimity; objectively, forbearance, or subjectively, fortitude." Now the Thayer's Greek-English Lexicon defines it as "slowness in avenging wrongs." The adverb for patience is "with long enduring temper, that is, leniently."

Rick (00:15:25): So we have this word, it's another word for patience. And it's interesting to me that we use in the English language, you use the same word for all these different kinds of patience. In the Greek language, there's three different words. That should tell you something, okay? And I really liked, I appreciated Greek-English Lexicon's "slowness in avenging wrongs." There is this self-restraint aspect of patience. And Jonathan, this is not the kind of patience we normally talk about because frankly, nobody likes to do it.

Jonathan (00:15:57): You're right.

Rick (00:15:57): Okay?

Jonathan (00:15:58): This is hard.

Rick (00:15:59): Yeah. Because if we feel something, we just want to act on it. And that's human nature. This is saying, "not so fast, not so fast." Let's give an example of forbearance, and this was from our Fruit of the Spirit series. Example of forbearance: When a loan, you take out a loan, when a loan is in forbearance, it means that you don't have to make payments or you can temporarily make smaller payments. What's happening is the loan holds back on its legal and required payment schedule. Taking advantage of this is convenient, but it certainly doesn't help you pay back that what you owe. The point is, when Covid hit, a lot of loans were put into forbearance because people couldn't work. So they said, okay, we're not going to charge you until you can get back to work, that kind of a thing. So forbearance is holding back, in many cases, that which you rightfully should have. And it's a developmental process in the Christian life that we need to look at. So we looked at the noun and the adverb for this word for forbearance. Jonathan, let's go to the verb, the action word.

Jonathan (00:17:05): And it means "to be long spirited; that is, (objectively) forbearing, or (subjectively) patient." The Thayer's Greek-English Lexicon defines this as "to be patient in bearing the offenses and injuries of others; to be mild and slow in avenging; to be longsuffering, slow to anger, slow to punish."

Rick (00:17:27): All of those things are contrary to what we're taught in our society right here, right now. We're taught "go get 'em. They push you, you push 'em right back. They say something to you, say something right back." This is a very different approach.

Jonathan (00:17:44): We really need to watch our emotions, Rick. This is saying we have to be on guard over our emotions.

Rick (00:17:51): And that is the key. That's why, Jonathan, truly believe that this kind of patience is the fruit of the spirit. It is the fruit of God's spirit in us because it doesn't come naturally, it doesn't come easily. It is something that we develop because of the grace of God's spirit. So let's look at this forbearance or self-restraint in action. Let's look at our first example, the parable of the ungrateful servant.

Jonathan (00:18:15): The context of this parable is that a servant owed a great deal to his master and he couldn't pay. So the master said to take his whole family and put them into servitude until the debt was paid in full. Matthew 18:26-27: "So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, Have patience (forbear) with me and I will repay you everything. And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt."

Rick (00:18:46): That's a powerful example. Had this massive, massive debt, and the lord of that servant said, okay, I'll forgive that debt. Go and take care of your life. So it's a tremendous example that Jesus uses. And of course what ends up happening in that parable is that that servant doesn't do a very good job. And somebody owes him 10 cents, essentially (I'm exaggerating), but he goes to the person, "I'll throw you in jail for that." And so we can receive it and we need to give it. That's really what that lesson in that parable is all about. So patience or longsuffering is a willingness to be non-reactive and appropriate. It also tells us to be willing to wait for a situation to completely unfold, to be disciplined in holding back. This kind of patience gives the benefit of the doubt and can only truly be displayed by humanity if we have a humble spirit. It can't work without humility.

Jonathan (00:19:52): Rick, I was thinking of the fruit of the spirit that comes right before patience. The fruit is peace. Now we need to master this peace before this kind of patience can be attained.

Rick (00:20:05): Yeah, you're right, because without peace, it would be, okay, I'm going to hold back. But with the peace of God, we hold back because we can see things through a different set of eyes. So it's not that internal struggle, it's holding back because it's a godly forbearance. And that's what we want to get to and develop as we open this up. So godly forbearance, how do we know? Well that's what we want to talk about now. God's forbearance, God's forbearance, God's restraint, if you will, is our primary example. In Romans 1, it was all about blatant idolatry and sensuality. Not a good chapter, really, very, very, very discouraging. In Romans 2, the Apostle Paul urges Christians to, with long enduring temper, refrain from judgment without proper cause and place. Romans 2, Jonathan, let's do verses 1-2, then we'll go to verse 4:

Jonathan (00:21:01): "Therefore you have no excuse, every one of you who passes judgment, for in that which you judge another, you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things. And we know that the judgment of God rightly falls upon those who practice such things." Well, being in the seat of judgment would be an idolatrous behavior. God is the judge. But Rick, there are times that we are supposed to judge, right?

Rick (00:21:29): Yeah, there are. That's the important thing. We're looking at this and the apostle is saying, "Look, don't you be judging others when you're doing the same kinds of things. You may be doing them differently. You may not be doing them as blatantly," but he's saying, "Don't be doing that." But you're right, there are times where judgment is appropriate and those are the times when we really need godly restraints, because otherwise we can get up on our high horse and have righteousness on our side and then pollute it with pride, pollute it with arrogance, pollute it with personal opinion.

Jonathan (00:22:03): And mercy has got to be a part of it. If we aren't merciful to others, we're not being Christlike.

Rick (00:22:11): Right. And we are in trouble as Christians. Really, that's the case. Look, the point here is it's just too easy to judge. Hold back. That's what the apostle is helping us see. Hold back. We forebear, because God in His spiritual wisdom forbears. Now we go to Romans 2. Now let's look at verse 4:

Jonathan (00:22:31): "Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience (forbearance), not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?" God held back for us. We should do the same for others and have great compassion for the sinner.

Rick (00:22:47): And when you realize, when you study the scriptures and you realize the amazing forbearance, holding back of God throughout all the ages of humanity, and you look at our little example of when we have to hold back because we don't get what we want, when we want, how we want, even though we may deserve it, you've got to look at that and say, "Wow, that's our example." It's so much higher. And you're right, mercy has to be right in front of it. You have to have that godly peace. God dramatically shows us His forbearance over and over and over again. His spirit within us will help us rise above our fleshly desires and deeds with a long-tempered approach to best manage life's inconsistencies. So our forbearance also has to do with waiting for the unfolding of God's plans and prophecies. See, we have to wait for the unfolding. That kind of waiting has to be with a steady heart and a steady mind. Let's look at James chapter 5:7-11. Let's do 7-8 and then we'll go to the other verses:

Jonathan (00:23:53): "Therefore be patient (forbear), brethren, until the coming of the Lord. The farmer waits for the precious produce of the soil, being patient (forbearing) about it, until it gets the early and late rains. You too be patient (forbear); strengthen your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is near. Do not complain, brethren, against one another, so that you yourselves may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing right at the door." Well this reminds me of last week's Episode #1285 about the kingdom. Knowing that this present evil world is crumbling all around us, it's hard to wait for the kingdom and the promised hope for all. We need to forebear and focus on developing Christ-likeness right now.

Rick (00:24:41): And that development of Christ's likeness right now doesn't happen by getting involved in all of the social activities that are around us and trying to right every single wrong. You need to stand up for righteousness, but we need to hold ourselves back in a godly fashion because God is not trying to correct the rights, the wrongs today. He's not, He's allowing them to happen. We need to hold ourselves back and be part of that process so that when the ministry of reconciliation actually begins, we are ready to be engaged in that. Hold yourself back with godly restraint. Waiting for God's plan to unfold can make us impatient, especially with one another. If we have this lack of forbearance, lack of self-restraint between us, let's take it as a warning sign. So when we get that, we're that way with one another, pause and consider. This is a warning sign. And again, the prophets are an example. James 5:10-11:

Jonathan (00:25:43): "As an example, brethren, of suffering and patience (forbearing), take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. We count those blessed who endured. You have heard of the endurance of Job and have seen the outcome of the Lord's dealings, that the Lord is full of compassion and is merciful."

Rick (00:26:01): So here in verses 10 and 11, you have an example, brethren, of suffering and forbearance, restraints. And then in verse 11, you have the endurance kind of patience. The two of them work together. Here James shows us the forbearance and the endurance of the prophets as well. They're a tremendous example for us to study and absorb and follow. Forbearance and endurance absolutely always go hand in hand.

Jonathan (00:26:31): This is not easy. I have a question. So if endurance is being under the weight of trial, how do we hold ourselves back and at the same time press ourselves forward?

Rick (00:26:43): Yeah, hold back, hold back, keep moving forward, hold back, but keep moving forward. How do you do that? And Jonathan, I think the answer, and that's a really good question, I think the answer is that the self-restraint is moving forward because if we're moving forward toward Christlikeness, we are restraining ourselves and allowing God's spirit to speak and act for us, to show us how. So it's the restraint of ourselves, so God's spirit can shine through us. So holding back is in fact moving forward as a Christian. The powerful process of patience--what do we have?

Jonathan (00:27:21): Thus far, we have seen forbearance as holding back from that which you can rightfully claim; holding back from judgment of those around us in a godly way and holding back our weariness in waiting for God's plan to flourish. The Old Testament prophets were all strong examples of this.

Rick (00:27:40): We need to look at their examples and be inspired by them. So here's the question. Am I in tune enough with God's spirit to recognize my personal need for forbearance? Or do I instead just react because that's what everybody else does? Where am I with all of this?

Jonathan (00:27:58): I thought of Peter as an example. When he gave his sermon at Pentecost, this was when the holy spirit was poured out on the apostles and disciples. Peter explained, with a level head, what was taking place. He held back his anger and explained how evil men crucified Jesus. He said Jesus was prophesied to be raised to God as Lord and Christ and that all should repent. He showed self-restraint and didn't let his emotions take over so he could preach the good news.

Rick (00:28:29): That's such a good example because the Peter before Pentecost would've got right up in those people's faces and said, and he would've been pointing his finger (and of course I'm using my imagination), and saying, "This is what you did, this is what you did." But here he's showing the reason that God allowed these things, and the magnitude of what God's plan would be for everybody because these things were allowed. So there was a great forbearance that came through God's spirit that came to Peter, the impetuous one. He stopped being impetuous right then and there. Doesn't mean that he completely outgrew it, but he stopped and he was the mouthpiece that Christianity got its beginning through. So you're looking at the old Simon versus the new Peter, and the difference is God's spirit and forbearance. So the forbearance we are to develop is a spirit-driven character trait. We can only develop it by paying attention to the spirit that brings it.

Jonathan (00:29:33): So forbearance is a really important Christian trait. How can we tell if we are properly developing it?

Rick (00:29:41): Already we can see that forbearance is required in every aspect of our discipleship. That being the case, we obviously need to understand when to apply it and how we can tell it's working. There are three times, three times in the New Testament where the word for forbearance is used in conjunction with another very specific word. This combination of words deepens the meaning of Christian forbearance.

Jonathan (00:30:12): Let's define this other word and review a few examples of how it is generally used in the New Testament. This word means "to hold oneself up against; that is, figuratively put up with." The Thayer's Greek-English Lexicon defines this as "to hold oneself erect and firm; or to sustain, to bear, to endure."

Rick (00:30:34): So you're holding yourself firm and and straight because you have to stand for something or against something or with something. So it's this firmness, this clarity, this strength of stance. So we're going to look at this word just for a few minutes and get a sense of it. Then we're going to see how it works with forbearance. The first example of holding oneself up in a firm way was demonstrated by Jesus in a very difficult situation. Now, the account we're going to be looking at in Luke occurred after the Mount of Transfiguration. There's a crowd, a man is begging for Jesus' help because his son was demon possessed and no one else could help. No one else could cast it out. So here's what happens in Luke 9:41-43:

Jonathan (00:31:21): "And Jesus answered and said, You unbelieving and perverted generation, how long shall I be with you and put up with you? Bring your son here...But Jesus rebuked the unclean spirit, and healed the boy and gave him back to his father. And they were all amazed at the greatness of God..." This is confusing. What is Jesus asking when he says, "How long shall I put up with you?"

Rick (00:31:46): I know. It sounds like he's just exasperated. He wants to throw everything away and "I'm done, I'm done with you." That's what it sounds like. But I don't believe at all that that's what it is. I think what Jesus is saying, and when it says, "how long shall I put up with you?" That's that word for stand firm, be strong in what you stand for. And I think that gives us a hint. It's not just "how long do I tolerate you"--it's "how long must I stand firm for the righteousness of God in a dark, sinful, broken, destroyed world. How long until I can just erase it all?" Because Jesus isn't exasperated. He heals the boy. His next statement is, "bring your son here." So there's not this exasperation; there's this sense of "it's dark here and I'm standing in light and how long until I can just finish the work that started."

Jonathan (00:32:47): The lesson is to stand firm as a follower of Christ when you see unfaithfulness surrounding you in the world.

Rick (00:32:54): Yeah, stand firm as a follower of Christ, absolutely positively. This next example of this word for standing erect or firm and standing for something, planting your feet kind of thing--the next example is the Apostle Paul encouraging the Thessalonians, in 2 Thessalonians 1:3-4:

Jonathan (00:33:13): "We ought always to give thanks to God for you, brethren, as it is only fitting, because your faith is greatly enlarged, and the love of each one of you toward one another grows ever greater; therefore, we ourselves speak proudly of you among the churches of God for your perseverance and faith in the midst of all your persecutions and afflictions which you endure." Paul was showing a deep appreciation for the Thessalonians because they stood firm no matter what the experiences were. We are also to stand firm as a follower of Christ when faced with persecutions and afflictions.

Rick (00:33:54): So that word at the end of those verses, "and faith in the midst of all your persecutions and afflictions, which you endure." The word for "endure" is that word for standing firm. So when you say stand firm as a follower of Christ, you're picking up exactly on what the Apostle Paul said they were doing. You've had hard times and yet you are standing, you're like a rock that cannot be moved. And that's very, very inspirational here. So we're seeing this word used, this word for standing firm, in a couple different ways. One more example, our final example of this word is the Apostle Paul urging the Hebrew Christians to stand firmly in their faith in light of needing the book of Hebrews as a guide for spiritual growth. So look at Hebrews 13:20-22:

Jonathan (00:34:42): "Now the God of peace... equip you in every good thing to do His will, working in us that which is pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory forever and ever. Amen. But I urge you, brethren, bear with this word of exhortation, for I have written to you briefly."

Rick (00:35:00): Now, this is an interesting use of this word because the word "bear" is this word for "stand firm." So what Paul is saying to the Hebrew Christians is, "Look, I wrote this very lengthy" (he says it's a few words; it's not a few words), but he says, "I've written this to you to help you to grow up in Christ." So he's given them a ton of information to say, "Spiritually, this is how to apply things, this is how to follow things. This is how you grow in Christ having such a strong Jewish background." And he's saying, "I urge you to stand firm in this exhortation. I'm giving this to you so I can show you how to stand firm in this exhortation." He's saying, "You needed this. Now take it and stand firm with it."

Jonathan (00:35:57): Another lesson is to stand firm as a follower of Christ when our faith needs instruction and encouragement.

Rick (00:36:04): So even when we're not maybe in the greatest position, it's still an opportunity to stand firm as we receive the teaching that is going to help us to be more Christlike. So we've seen this idea of standing firm being applied to standing in spite of (that was Jesus standing in spite of the darkness that was around him), standing against (this was the Thessalonians standing against the persecutions and afflictions), and standing because of (this was the Hebrew Christians standing as a result of Paul encouraging them). So we've seen it three different ways. Now we've got that other word here, this word for "standing." Now let's look at this word for "standing" in relation to forbearance.

Jonathan (00:36:52): Paul had just told the Ephesians how deeply he had prayed for them in his imprisonment while they were dealing with some core belief issues challenging Jewish and Gentile Christian fellowship. Ephesians 4:1-6, starting with 1: "Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called..." Walk like a disciple of Christ. Follow him with assurance and be alert.

Rick (00:37:23): "Walk in the manner of the calling with which you were called." And when you think about that, Jonathan, I often think about Christian soldiers. The hymn "Onward Christian Soldiers" is a very inspiring thing. And when you think of a soldier, you think of somebody who stands firm and strong and stands tall and and stands at attention. And when you think about it, what does it mean when you stand at attention? It means literally your entire body is ready and you are paying attention. That's what the apostle is saying in Ephesians 4:1; walk in that manner where you're standing at attention, where you're walking as a soldier ready for whatever action, whatever command might come before you.

Jonathan (00:38:06): In verse 2, we're going to be using the two words together to deepen the meaning of Christian forbearance. Verses 2-3: "...with all humility and gentleness, with patience (forbearance), showing tolerance, standing firm for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace."

Rick (00:38:29): So "with all humility and gentleness, with forbearance standing firm," this is a tremendously powerful combination. Hold yourself back so you can stand firm in Christ. Have humility and gentleness be your basis as you restrain yourself, your humanity from reactive behavior towards those who may question your standing as true Christians. The issue in the book of Ephesians, one of the issues was the Judaizing Christians were giving a hard time to the Christians that came from Gentile backgrounds. And there was this tension. And what the apostle is saying is, "Look, you're just as much a Christian as those others." Have forbearance. Don't say what you want to say. All right? Have that self-restraint and stand firm in Christ. Stand firm for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the spirit.

Jonathan (00:39:31): Next, Ephesians 4:4-6: "There is one body and one spirit, just as also you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all who is over all and through all and in all."

Rick (00:39:47): That's the result. That's where we need to get to with this standing firm. Forbear and stand firm in Christ. That's the key here; forbear. Have self-restraint and as you have self-restraint, use it so you can actually stand firm in Christ rather than standing firm in Rick. I've tried standing firm in Rick and you know what ended up happening? It was a wreck. I'm just telling you.

Jonathan (00:40:16): I can understand that, brother.

Rick (00:40:19): No seriously, it doesn't work. And I've tried forbearing not because of the right reasons, but I know I just shouldn't say something. You get all tied up inside. You know what that's like, right?

Jonathan (00:40:31): Oh yeah.

Rick (00:40:32): And it just doesn't bring us where we need to. Self-restraint for godly reasons and then standing firm in Christ--that's what these verses are telling us. Forbearance is a defining characteristic of discipleship. And Jonathan, this is huge. This is huge. Are you ready for this? This is huge.

Jonathan (00:40:50): I am ready.

Rick (00:40:50): It is a primary defining characteristic of selfless love. Let's look at 1 Corinthians 13, that's the love chapter, verses 3-7:

Jonathan (00:41:01): "And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing. Love is patient (forbearing), love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." Jesus loves us with great restraint. This is how we're to love one another. How do we do that? By focusing on the will of God.

Rick (00:41:45): And here's the thing about these verses. We all read the love chapter. These verses get read at weddings. And oftentimes we miss the point of the very beginning. We say "love is patient" and we think, okay, love is just willing to wait. It's willing to just be calm and cool and collected. This is not saying that. This is, love is forbearing. Love is full of self-restraint. That's the first quality, the first one that the Apostle Paul attributes here. It's no accident that self-restraint is such an important part of our Christian walk. That's why it's one of the fruits of the spirit.

Jonathan (00:42:28): And how about listening to the value of this word in the marriage relationship?

Rick (00:42:33): Yeah. How about that?

Jonathan (00:42:34): How about forbearing, brother?

Rick (00:42:37): How about self restraint when we have those difficulties within marriage? And this is the selfless love. That's the first quality that was shown of selfless love. That's how big this is. We need to understand this forbearance is much, much more than just what we normally would just write off as, yeah, just wait, it's okay. This is much bigger than that. So the powerful process of patience, what do we have?

Jonathan (00:43:04): Our lesson here is clear. Forbear, restrain yourself from natural reactions and responses and instead choose to stand firm in Christ because he taught us to stand firm in love. To selflessly love is to first and foremost commit to restraint as we put others first, even if they may view our Christianity differently.

Rick (00:43:28): And that was the issue with the Ephesians. Their Christianity was being viewed as a secondary kind of Christianity. And the point was even if you're being looked at that way, you have the forbearance necessary to stand up for Christlikeness on a higher level. So the question here is, the question is, am I committed to forbearance, to self-restraint when it comes to the brotherhood? Or am I settling for just being reactive? And let's be honest, a lot of times the answer is yeah, I kind of settle for just being reactive. It's so much easier, but it's so much less productive. There is so much to learn about having the patience that requires self-restraint. If we ever thought this was easy, we need to think again.

Jonathan (00:44:17): Now that we see how our self restraining patience helps us stand firm in Christ, how else should it be applied?

Rick (00:44:25): Well, we now see the importance of love as a primary driving force, as we apply the patience of self-restraint and stand firm for Christ regarding issues of Christian interpretation. Okay, so issues of Christian interpretation is what we've been looking at here. This same formula will apply to every other aspect of our experiences. As a matter of fact, as Christians, there should never be a time when our forbearance is applied in the absence of selfless love. If we are applying it, Jonathan, because we know we should, well that's good, but it's not that Christlikeness. It is just that it is following Rick, and you end up being a wreck. Okay? You don't want to do that. You want to rise up to this higher level of godly self-restraint.

Jonathan (00:45:20): Forbearance applied in love is required when dealing with whatever issues we may have within the body of Christ. If properly exercised, we will stand firm in Christ and not ourselves. And again, these two words are used together, which deepens the meaning. Colossians 3:12-13: "So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (forbearance), bearing (standing firm) with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you." This forbearance is hard to do, especially when we have a challenge with someone that sees things differently than we do. We must rise above without compromising biblical principles and love each member of the body of Christ because they are chosen of God.

Rick (00:46:23): And this is exactly the same formula that we just talked about. You have this forbearance or self-restraint and then you have the standing firm. Those two words are together. And you're right, it really deepens the meaning. So this is the same formula. When we have complaints about or issues with each other, what do we need? Well, before we get to the patience, the self-restraint and the standing firm, we need, the scripture says we need compassion and kindness and humility and gentleness so we can properly forbear and therefore stand firm in Christ as we stand with those of the brotherhood that we have issues with. See Jonathan, it's not a matter of standing just for Christ, but it's standing with those that we have issues with. If we are all working at following Christ and we're all really trying, but we're just knocking heads on something, we need to learn to stand with one another. And that takes forbearance because when I forebear, I could then stand for Christ because I'm trying to pull myself out of the way. As we stand firm in Christ, this opens the door for an even higher basis of fellowship. We're still in Colossians 3. Now let's go to verses 14-17:

Jonathan (00:47:46): "Beyond all these things (what things? Forgiving one another), put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father." This is what a healthy group of brethren looks like; having one purpose based in love with heartfelt harmony and praise.

Rick (00:48:32): Yeah, you're right. This is what a healthy group of brethren looks like. And folks, this is hard to get to, especially if we have in this healthy group of the brotherhood, those who have a lot of passion and, and drive for the gospel. Because inevitably we'll see things a little differently here or there and everywhere and we'll rub each other the wrong way. But what this is saying is the peace of Christ rules in your hearts. This is the, and how do you let the peace of Christ rule in your heart? What you do is, you get out of the way by restraining yourself, and you stand with, through the spirit, stand with Christ and with the brotherhood.

Jonathan (00:49:14): Forbear and stand firm in Christ.

Rick (00:49:18): This, to forebear and stand firm in Christ, leads to strong and mutually uplifting fellowship in Christ. And Jonathan, when we have issues, what we need to do is decide that we will forebear so we can mutually stand firm. That's a hard thing, but that's a required part of our Christianity. Look at all these scriptures that we've been reading that shows it to us. Let's continue. Forbearance is required for those in positions of spiritual responsibility and leadership. And this is no surprise that forbearance has to be, has to be, has to be a part of the leadership within Christianity. 2 Timothy 4:1-2:

Jonathan (00:50:03): "I solemnly charge you in the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who is to judge the living and the dead, and by his appearing and his kingdom; preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience (that's the forbearing) and instruction."

Rick (00:50:27): This self-restraint, this great patience, this great forbearance; this self-restraint in Christian leadership is a must. The apostle is telling Timothy (because he's turning a lot of his responsibility over to Timothy as this is Paul's last writing), he's saying, reprove, rebuke, exhort. How? With great self-restraint, with great patience and great instruction. Leadership within the body of Christ is only, only about the word of God and never about any personal feelings or agendas. We need to get that through our thick heads so that we can understand that we're standing for Christ with Christ, with the brotherhood, by self-restraint.

Jonathan (00:51:15): Developing and maintaining forbearance in leadership prepares one for the hardest of times. We're going to stay in 2 Timothy 4. Let's do verses 3-5: "For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but wanting to have their ears tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in accordance to their own desires, and will turn away their ears from the truth and will turn aside to myths. But you, be sober in all things, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry." Look at the contrast from verses 1-2 to verses 3-5. I know Paul is warning us of the corruption coming to Christianity. And rightfully so. History shows us Rome made Christianity a state religion and corrupted its teachings.

Rick (00:52:10): They did. They combined Paganism with Christianity and it all came to pieces and it got worse as time went on. The Apostle Paul, even when he was still alive, says even now there's a corruption happening within the body of Christ, and we need to be very, very, very, very careful. So there's this warning to reprove, rebuke, exhort with great restraint because there will come a time when they will not endure. That phrase "they will not endure." That's the word for standing firm. They won't stand firm for sound doctrine, but they want their ears tickled. They want their bellies rubbed. They want to feel contented and happy, not Christ-like.

Jonathan (00:52:55): Forbear and stand firm in Christ.

Rick (00:52:59): That's really what this all boils down to. This approach to shepherding leads the leaders to be impervious to outside influences and maintain a pure focus on the truth of the gospel. And think about--Jonathan, when I grow up, I want to learn how to be impervious to outside influences. I want to learn because that's what Jesus was. He was impervious to whatever came around him because he was so, so focused and so clear. He stood so firmly, and he restrained his humanity for the sake of his spirituality of doing the will of God, not the will of a perfect human being. That's a big deal. That's a big deal for us.

Jonathan (00:53:37): And he even restrained himself when he threw the moneychangers' tables over and forced the animals out. But he did not let the doves go. He handed them to the owners so that the poor would have a sacrifice.

Rick (00:53:52): There was, there was absolutely restraint. This was not some flying off the handle. Jesus knew exactly what he was doing, exactly how he was doing it, so he could accomplish exactly the lesson that needed to be taught. Self-restraint, so godliness can reign. We stand in Christ with God. Fortunately, we have many examples of this forbearance, the self-restraint in the Old Testament. Again, we're going back to the Old Testament. It is full of this and it's awesome. The Hebrew Christians were exhorted to have the forbearance of the prophets in their own personal experiences. Hebrews 6:10-12:

Jonathan (00:54:28): "For God is not unjust so as to forget your work and the love which you have shown toward His name, in having ministered and in still ministering to the saints. And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence so as to realize the full assurance of hope until the end, so that you will not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience (forbearance) inherit the promises." How do we inherit the promises? Through faith and self-restraint, and with selfless love as our guiding principle.

Rick (00:55:03): And Jonathan, when we talk about, as Christians, we talk about the promises of God and we're always saying, have faith, have faith in the promises, have faith. And that's true and that's important. But what this is saying here is be imitators of those who, through faith and self-restraint, inherit the promises. What does self-restraint got to do with inheriting the promises? It is holding yourself back so that there is room for those promises to be planted, to grow and to develop and to guide you. That's why we need the self-restraint with the faith. You need to have both. Self-restraint is so powerfully important. I mean, how often did the prophets have to wait for God's instruction when all seemed lost or chaotic?

Jonathan (00:55:51): So many times.

Rick (00:55:52): Yeah, yeah. And they got frustrated. But God saw them through. They had to learn. They weren't perfect. It's not about being perfect, it's about being faithful. It's about having restraint and that faithfulness so we can stand. Our self-restraint, Jonathan, is one of the most important qualities that we should develop as Christians. And I will tell you flat out, before this study on this word "forbearance," I don't know that I would've made that statement. But seeing the depth and the power and the breadth of how it's applied, I truly believe it is one of the most important qualities that we as Christians need to develop. 1 Thessalonians 5:14-22:

Jonathan (00:56:36): "We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient (forbear) with one another. See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people. Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not quench the spirit; do not despise prophetic utterances. But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; abstain from every form of evil."

Rick (00:57:13): There is so much in these few verses in 1 Thessalonians here. But let's examine this very, very quickly. "Encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be forbearing with one another, with everyone. Make sure no one repays evil for evil." How do you do that? By being self-restrained. "Always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people." How do you do that? Through self-restraint, godly self-restraint. "Rejoice always." How do you do that? With godly self-restraint so you can truly rejoice even in trial. "Pray without ceasing." Hold yourself back so you can pray and put things out to God. "In everything give thanks." Who does that naturally? Nobody! But with self-restraint, we can. This is the will of God for you in Christ. "Do not quench the spirit." Again, self-restraint. Let this spirit grow within you. I mean you get the point. There is such power in self-restraint, in this kind of patience. Let's begin to wrap this up; the powerful process of patience:

Jonathan (00:58:20): Patience can mean simply waiting with intention, as well as waiting with intention while you are heavily burdened. As we have seen, it can also mean having forbearance, the quality of self-restraint. For Christians, this quality comes into play when we want or deserve something, or when our emotions are getting the best of us. While mastering this kind of patience is difficult, it is a necessary trait of true disciples of Christ.

Rick (00:58:51): Absolutely necessary. Mentioned many times in scriptures. So here's the question; am I truly focusing my Christian character by forbearing, or am I simply giving in to self-governing decisions and feelings? Think about how this works. Forbearance is such a critically important part of our lives. Folks, as we take a look at this, let's walk away from this lesson on forbearance with a new appreciation of what the scriptures teach us in terms of managing ourselves so that Christ and his glory can grow within us. Our personal glory has to be put out of the way so the glory of Christ can rise up, take over, take root, and never turn back. Self-restraint. Think about it folks. We love hearing from our listeners. We welcome your feedback and questions on this episode or other episodes at ChristianQuestions.com. Coming up in our next episode, "What Does God Promise Us As Christians?" Talk to you next week.

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