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Announcer (00:00:00): It's time to think about the Bible like you never have before. This is Christian Questions. After this episode, go to ChristianQuestions.com to check out other episodes, Bible study resources, videos, download the CQ app and more. Today's topic is, "How Strong Are My Relationships? (Part III)". Coming up in this episode, our relationships that have strong family ties or common close friend interests can be challenging to keep healthy. As Christians, we're not only asked to work on these, but also to develop strong bonds with others whom we have nothing in common except Christ. How do we do that? Here's Rick and Jonathan.

Rick (00:00:41): Welcome everyone. I'm Rick. I'm joined by Jonathan, my co-host for over 20 years. Jonathan, what's our theme scripture for this episode?

Jonathan (00:00:50): 1 Peter 1:22: "Seeing you have purified your souls and obeying the truth through the spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that you love one another with a pure heart fervently."

Rick (00:01:04): Human relationships are a key factor in human survival and wellbeing. We need them, and God has designed humanity in such a way as to thrive when healthy relationships are present. In Parts I and II of this three-part series, we drilled down into marriage relationships, as well as family and close friend relationships. We found striking similarities in the how-to of making these relationships stronger. Much of our input came from 1 Corinthians 13, which is commonly called the "love chapter." In our final episode of this series, we now look at our relationships with fellow Christians. Though the principles remain the same, what we will find here are some significant differences and challenges unique to our calling in Christ. So looking at this, we are focusing in on the brotherhood and those relationships.

Jonathan (00:02:00): We'll be using 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 for our basic source for direction and answers: "Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous. Love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly, it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered. Does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."

Jonathan (00:02:34): We've read these scriptures, I don't know, a hundred times - I'm exaggerating <laugh> - in these three episodes. But Jonathan, they are so appropriate and so profound, we keep coming back to them because they put things in order. So as with our last two episodes, here are our questions for consideration as we will discuss our Christian brotherhood relationships:

Jonathan (00:02:57): How do we measure the health of Christian brotherhood relationships?

Jonathan (00:03:01): Next question. What are the most important foundations to build Christian brotherhood relationships upon?

Jonathan (00:03:07): What are common areas of weakness in Christian brotherhood relationships?

Jonathan (00:03:12): And what should I always bring to the table in my Christian brotherhood relationships?

Jonathan (00:03:18): How can I contribute to my Christian brotherhood relationships, even if others seem distant or uninterested? So Rick, let's get started with our first question: How do you measure the health of Christian brotherhood relationships?

Jonathan (00:03:34): Okay, how do you do that? You do that the same way we did everything else. You measure love, and you measure respect exactly the same way we would with marriage; exactly the same way we would with our family relationships and close friend relationships. It always comes back to this selfless love and respect. So Jonathan, just a quick review of love and respect:

Jonathan (00:03:59): And this love is the highest form of love. It's a selfless love and a benevolent love that gives with no thought of reciprocation. It is only concerned with the wellbeing of those to which it is giving. Now, what about respect or honor? To be respectful of someone is to show them honor, to lift them up to a higher and cherished position for the purpose of having a relationship with them. Which leads us to the question, how well does my life reflect this selfless love and respect for the brotherhood? While I may think that I live these things, can others see what I believe I'm living?

Jonathan (00:04:39): Can others see what I believe I'm living? This is really important. We need to understand that. I may think that I'm presenting myself this open book of selfless love. And Jonathan, you can be saying, this guy's really... Yeah, yeah. It's important because we want to learn to see things through others' eyes and apply these principles in the way we need to. So how do you measure our health of Christian brotherhood and relationships? You measure love and respect. How am I doing with those things? What's our next question now?

Jonathan (00:05:15): What are the most important foundations to build Christian brotherhood relationships upon?

Jonathan (00:05:21): We're going to suggest that selfless love and respect are obvious, and that we need to add to these the highest and most pure intentions that we can muster. This ends up being a very big deal. It all starts with Jesus and his example to his disciples. Whenever you're in doubt about anything, go back to the way Jesus did it. So Jonathan, let's begin to explore that.

Jonathan (00:05:45): Both selfless love and respect or honor were plainly explained by Jesus to his disciples the night before his crucifixion. His explanation boldly showed us the absolute foundation of Christian brotherhood. Rick, this is a big deal. We really need to pay attention to what Jesus taught.

Jonathan (00:06:06): We do, and the more we focus in on what he taught, how he taught it, where he taught it, when he taught it, and why he taught it, we can begin to get it, but it takes that intentional focusing. So we're going to look back at some of these very, very profound teachings. We're going to begin right after Jesus spoke the Parable of the Vine and the Branches. And of course we all know that parable; it was a parable of tremendous sensitivity and connectedness between God, Jesus" and his disciples. In this parable, Jesus explained how each of his disciples as branches were directly connected to him as the vine. He explained that God oversees this relationship for the purpose of the branches producing God-honoring fruit. That's the purpose of that whole relationship, God-honoring fruit. So let's go to John 15:9-17. We're going to begin with 9-10:

Jonathan (00:07:06): This is from the New International Version, and I'll be reading the word "love" with the true meaning. "As the Father has selflessly loved me, so have I selflessly loved you. Now remain in my selfless love. If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my selfless love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and remain in His selfless love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete." Rick, in those two verses, "love" appears five times. And the point is, selfless loves brings joy IF we would let it. Think about how selfless love motivated Jesus. Hebrews 12:2: "Who for the joy set before him endured the cross, despising the shame and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

Jonathan (00:08:01): So just from those two verses in John 15 and that verse in Hebrews, what you're saying very, very plainly is the message from Jesus is, selfless love is the foundational theme. It's the foundational theme. And if you didn't get it, it's the foundational theme! It begins with God, it's expressed through Jesus, and it is to grow within us. We have it so the joy of Jesus' service to God can flourish and become complete in us as well. Selfless love is the foundational theme.

Jonathan (00:08:35): And Jesus continues; John 15:12-13: "My commandment is this, love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends." Now we are tasked with treating one another with the same selfless love that Jesus lived.

Jonathan (00:08:56): And Jonathan, we can chalk up three more "loves" in these next two verses as well. (You're right.) It's such a big deal, and it is our responsibility to have that same love for one another because that's what Jesus is saying here. We've got this powerful foundation of selfless love clearly in place. And now with that in place, the respect and honor of our relationships will now be made clear by Jesus. So he has set the foundation, and look at what he talks about next - John 15:14-15:

Jonathan (00:09:32): "You are my friends. If you do what I command, I no longer call you servants because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father, I have made known to you." Now, this word translated "friend" means dear, a friendly, actively fond that is friendly.

Jonathan (00:09:58): So there's a big change here. He says in verse 14, "You are my friends." Now this is different. This is a new level of relationship. And he said, "No longer are you servants." I'm putting you at a higher level. So look, he set the foundation of selfless love. And then he says, here's the respect, here's the lifting you up in honor as we move forward. Jesus clearly elevated his disciples to close friendships. Not only would those be treated with selfless love, but now also to be honored and respected as those close to him personally. So in the last two episodes on relationships, we've been talking about love and respect and love and respect and love and respect. Here, it's very plain and very simple. Jesus says, I selflessly love you and I respect you. How much more of an invitation can we get to love and respect as the basis than Jesus himself the night before his crucifixion, putting these things in place.

Jonathan (00:11:11): Continuing in John 15:16-17: "You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit, fruit that will last. And so that whatever you ask in my name, the Father will give you. This is my commandment; love each other." Well, let me get this straight, Rick. Jesus said this is a commandment. So it's not just a suggestion.

Jonathan (00:11:38): <Laugh> No, it's a commandment. That's such an important point because this is like hard work. I don't know if you've noticed, but selfless love is just not natural. (Right.) And if it's a command to rise to that level, not merely a suggestion, we need to treat it as something that, whether it's hard work or not, I am brought to this point. This is my responsibility. This is my job. Think about this, this highly honored position of friendship was not because of anything his disciples did. It was because he chose them. He called them, he chose them, which means he chose us to this same high and lofty and privileged position.

Jonathan (00:12:23): And we know that because he said that in John 17. Jesus not only prayed for the disciples who were with him then, but also for those who would later follow him through the writings of the New Testament. That's us.

Jonathan (00:12:36): Yeah. And that's exciting. And this really sets a foundation, a basis, for our relationship with one another. Just look at how Jesus treated us and how he said, this is what you need to do with each other. So here's the template. We've looked at Jesus' example. Now here's the template for our response to and our treatment of one another as honored disciples. Let's look at 1 Peter 1:22. And that's our theme scripture for this episode.

Jonathan (00:13:07): "Seeing you have purified your souls and obeying the truth through the spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that you love one another with a pure heart fervently." There are several words that are very important. "Unfeigned" meaning undisguised and sincere love of the brethren. That's the philadelphia love, meaning brotherly love, fraternal affection. "Pure" means clean. The definition of "fervently"" is earnestly and intensely. So let's rephrase this first. So with a sincere brotherly affection, see that you selflessly love one another from a clean heart with great intensity." Now this scripture comes from a mature and focused Peter, combining both types of love together.

Jonathan (00:13:59): Peter - this is one of my, and I think I mentioned this in the last episode with Julie. This is one of my favorite scriptures because it shows Peter's growth and maturity. Peter's approach was just intense. His intensity is poured out in this particular text, saying you've got to put it all together. And it can't be halfway; it can't be a little bit. It's got to be a full commitment to all of it. This is what Jesus taught us. This is what Peter learned and what Peter also is teaching us. So revisiting, refocusing and reestablishing my relationships. Where are we beginning here?

Jonathan (00:14:35): Discipleship in its mutual relationships clearly and fully depends upon following Jesus's personal example. Because of our blatant imperfections, we need to add liberal amounts of our purest intentions of Christ-likeness to the already proven mixture of selfless love and respect.

Jonathan (00:14:56): We need to add liberal amounts of our purest intentions because we have challenges in that area. This is big, this is important. Wwe're just at the beginning here, and we're already deeply involved in life-changing challenges. The question is, will we accept them?

Jonathan (00:15:18): It is obvious that we should love each other intensely, but why does Peter specifically tell us to do it with a pure heart?

Jonathan (00:15:26): That is a great question. The answer here is not only fascinating, it's powerful as well. To understand Peter's focus on a pure heart, we first observed that our example, Jesus, always had a pure heart. We, on the other hand, we need to develop that purity. In the areas of life such as marriage or family, that purity can be easier to develop because we're already connected. However, with the brotherhood, <laugh> see, with the brotherhood, that connection may be harder to find because we're more diverse. And that's really where we're going to begin to explore now. So Jonathan, what's our next question?

Jonathan (00:16:05): What are common areas of weakness in Christian brotherhood relationships? 1 Corinthians 13:4-6: "Love is not jealous. Love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly, it does not seek its own, it is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness." Just as with marriage, family, and close friendships, issues among the brotherhood arise from things like jealousy, bragging, arrogance, acting immaturely, being self-centered, being easily provoked, keeping score and being accepting of unrighteousness. Now for more detail on common areas of weakness in relationships, see Part I of this series, Episode 1268. Go to ChristianQuestions.com or the CQ app and enter the episode number into the search bar.

Rick (00:16:59): Jonathan, I'm glad you brought that up because, folks, this three-part series is meant to be worked with together because we covered things in the first episode that the second two episodes didn't cover. We're covering things here we haven't even talked about in the previous ones. You put them together and there's a relationship approach that is scriptural and sound, and it really works if we're willing to put the work in. So thanks for that reference. So let's continue here. What are the common areas of weakness in Christian brotherhood relationships? The call to follow Christ goes out to an amazing variety of people.

Jonathan (00:17:36): And Rick, let me stop you there. Think about it. The brotherhood is all wired differently, but even with our differences, we still have to sit at the lunch table together.

Rick (00:17:48): <Laugh> So I have to sit next to you, is that what you're saying? <Laugh> And that's such a good example. And you know what? We'll come back to that later. But the idea is yes, we're all different, but we're supposed to sit at the same table. So each of these different individuals from different walks of life is called away from their old lives into this new fellowship built on the g"ospel and Jesus' example. No wonder we can have such issues getting along. It's a new fellowship. So let's get into that. This new fellowship, Jonathan, let's begin to expand that.

Jonathan (00:18:27): The word for "fellowship" is well known. The Greek word "koinonia" means partnership and participation.

Rick (00:18:35): Okay, partnership and participation. Sounds very simple, but it's very deep. It's very deep. What we may not realize is that this very common word for fellowship in the New Testament that many Christians talk about, it first appears in the New Testament, only after the Apostle Peter speaks at Pentecost. What happened there? Many believed, as the power of the holy spirit was guiding Peter. And here's what it says as he's wrapping up his comments in this incredible discourse at Pentecost. Acts 2:41-42:

Jonathan (00:19:10): "So then those had received his word were baptized, and that day there were added about three thousand souls. They were continually devoting themselves to the apostles' teachings and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.

Rick (00:19:25): So true Christian fellowship began at Pentecost. Now, why would we say that? Several reasons. First, Jesus was risen and the price had been paid. Next, the Gospel message was now in full force and God's spirit had become the comforter and guide that Jesus promised would come. And third, this begins this new era that would eventually call disciples from everywhere.

Jonathan (00:19:51): And this was a brand new. Everything changed, Rick. This fellowship is not just an association, it's much more than that. It's a partnership and participation with one another. The body of Christ is dependent upon this type of spiritual fellowship with individuals that come from all walks of life.

Rick (00:20:11): Yeah, yeah, you're right. It is a partnership. And a partnership in its truest sense has dependency, interdependency. That's what Christian fellowship is meant to be. But here's the thing, in spite of the miraculous in-gathering and the beginning of Christianity, for the first several years of Christianity, Christians still had issues with their imperfect humanity. Even though it's like, whoa, this is like the greatest thing ever, we still had issues. James 4:1-2:

Jonathan (00:20:40): "What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? You lust and do not have; so you commit murder. You are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask."

Rick (00:20:59): Humanity in its natural, imperfect form does not naturally fit in with the call of Christianity. It just doesn't fit.

Jonathan (00:21:10): And James is saying there is no place for this in Christ. He's describing selfishness and a fleshly-focused dark side of humanity.

Rick (00:21:20): Yeah. Yeah, he is. Jonathan, a quick story from early in my business career. I work in a business where there are different groups within,, that overlap in their territories and so forth. And in this experience, there are two different groups. I was part of one of them and they didn't get along. They did things differently, and there was a lot of friction. So there was this meeting called by the higher-ups to bring these two warring factions, if you will, together. And in the morning session there was a lot of name-calling and pointing a finger. Now I didn't do any of that because that's just not my style, but I'm watching this, and it's not looking good. So the gentleman that brought this meeting together came to be lunchtime and he said, okay, lunchtime, we have an hour. And he appointed certain individuals who go to lunch together. And he appointed the most loud and critical individual from one side to go to lunch with the most loud and critical individual from the other. And he made these pairings and said, go to lunch and just talk to each other. Just talk to each other. And in the afternoon session, it was entirely different because they all got to know each other and realized, hey wait, we work for the same company, and we can do better than this. And it was such wisdom. The point was, they were made to talk to one another and it really stuck with me. And this is many, many, many, many, many years ago. So if people in the world can do that, Christians certainly should be able to do that.

Jonathan (00:22:50): Absolutely.

Rick (00:22:51): Okay. So even we're not fighting with the vile side of our nature, challenges will still be present. Further issues can develop as we each apply what we believe are Christian principles to our lives because Christianity is a very personal thing. We personally apply our Christianity with different individual guidelines. These are the guidelines that we look at and say, okay, this is how I'm going to be a Christian. This can actually bring friction amongst us. So we're going to look at Romans 14:1-8. We're going to begin with verses 1-4 to illustrate the difference in individual guidelines and focus:

Jonathan (00:23:29): "Now accept the one who is weak in faith, but not for the purpose of passing judgment on his opinions. One person has faith that he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats vegetables only."

Rick (00:23:43): So the apostle is saying, people have different perspectives about how they treat what they take in for food as Christians, and they're very important decisions, and they clash. Let's go to verse 3:

Jonathan (00:23:56): "The one who eats is not to regard with contempt the one who does not eat, and the one who does not eat is not to judge the one who eats, for God has accepted him."

Rick (00:24:06): So the apostle continues and says, look, the one who's got the broader perspective doesn't look down upon the one with the narrow perspective and the one with the narrow perspective doesn't look with contempt upon the other. They are both trying their best to serve God. Verse 4:

Jonathan (00:24:22): "Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls; and he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand." Well, there's a no-judgment zone at the lunch table.

Rick (00:24:36): <Laugh> So here comes the lunch table, and it's true. And they're at the lunch table; they're literally eating together. And the apostle is basically making that statement. No, there's not a judgment zone. Here we are together; we are unified. So in our personal perceptions of our Christianity, we can have differences. But the apostle is saying, work with one another. Well, what about when we apply our Christianity in a public sense with different guidelines? This can also bring friction because surprise, surprise, we can apply it differently than our brother. Romans 14:5-6:

Jonathan (00:25:11): "One person regards one day above another, another regards every day alike. Each person must be fully convinced in his own mind. He who observes the day observes it for the Lord, and he who eats does so for the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and he who eats not, for the Lord he does not eat, and gives thanks to God." Rick, we need to be sensitive not to come down on others. If they're wrong, they might grow out of it. And I look back on my life and I grew out of many wrongs. I was a real slow learner.

Rick (00:25:48): <Laugh> Alright, well here's the thing. You say you were a real slow learner and the focus of that is, you were a learner. Sometimes we learn slowly, but if we're learning, that's the point. And so the apostle says, look, we may see things outwardly in a very different way and proclaim this is the way it should be. And the other claims, no, that's the way it should be. The apostle is saying, look, they're both giving thanks to God in their stance. Let us manage that and respect that and allow the learning process to happen. See, we can disagree with one another and still have clear consciences. And that's a big point. We're working to honor God while on two or more sides of - pick an issue, pick an issue, any issue - obviously knowledge with one or more parties in these things is not clear, because you know what? Everybody can't be right if you see something exactly opposite. Somebody is wrong or both of you are wrong, but you both can't be right. You can both be partially right.

Jonathan (00:26:52): <Laugh> You're right, Rick. <Laugh>

Rick (00:26:55): But so what we have to do is work on that. We have to work on our ability to focus in on the right things.

Jonathan (00:27:03): And so what you're saying, Rick, is we all need to grow into Christ. Maybe I'm right on an issue, but maybe I'm wrong in the way I approach my being right. If my attitude is wrong, it is a sin.

Rick (00:27:17): Yeah. Yeah. And that's a big deal. That's a big deal. That's hard to admit. But you're right. We can be a hundred percent right and still have that sin. So whether we're cloudy or clear in what we actually understand, here's the bottom line. And that again comes from Romans 14:7-8:

Jonathan (00:27:33): "For not one of us lives for himself and not one of us dies for himself, for if we live, we live for the Lord, or if we die, we die for the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's."

Rick (00:27:46): So basically the apostle's saying, we can be right in our wrongness and wrong in our rightness.<Laugh> And we just got to be very, very careful with all of this so we put things in relationship. And so we're seeing these common areas of weakness in the body of Christ, and they can be in matters of conscience. And we're working on and we're trying to grow through them. The friction we're challenged with can be better handled by applying principles over passion. Jonathan, we're going to read Romans 14:13-15, but I'll interrupt you several times, and we're going to point out where principles are being brought out and then where our passion for our perspective is being brought out. So when we start the reading in verse 13, it's a principle. Let's start with verses 13 and get into 14 before we, we stop again:

Jonathan (00:28:33): "Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this - not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother's way. I know, and am convinced in the Lord Jesus, that nothing is unclean in itself."

Rick (00:28:48): So the apostle says, let's be determined to not put an obstacle in our brother's way. I know what I believe to be right, period, end of statement, but I'm not putting an obstacle. That's the principle. Now, when we look at this, we look at our brother's passion. Here's what the apostle says next:

Jonathan (00:29:04): "But to him who thinks anything to be unclean, to him it is unclean."

Rick (00:29:12): So their brother's passion saying, but no, I can't do that. And we have to have respect for that. Even if they're misguided, we need to have respect. And then the next verse, verse 15, begins to show our passion:

Jonathan (00:29:26): "For if because of food your brother is hurt, you are no longer walking according to love."

Rick (00:29:32): Now that hurts right there. If you are saying, too bad about you, you are no longer walking according to love and your passion has led you astray. So the principle is what the apostle ends on at the last part of verse 15:

Jonathan (00:29:47): "Do not destroy with your food him for whom Christ died." That's powerful. Now, this lesson is an example for all kinds of personal preferences, but we're not talking about moral difficulties here, Rick. That's an entirely different discussion, isn't it?

Rick (00:30:05): Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the principle here is, don't destroy your brother with your passion when it's something that there may be differences on. That's the principle here. We need to understand that we all have weaknesses. So as we revisit, refocus, and reestablish our relationships, where are we at this point?

Jonathan (00:30:24): There is not an area of life that is exempt from potential friction as we walk in fellowship with other disciples. Emotions, preferences, past experience, tradition, scriptural interpretation, scriptural application can all bring us closer or divide us. Let us be always alert to these challenges and be always reaching for selfless love, respect, and purity of heart as we walk together in Christ.

Rick (00:30:54): And Jonathan, I'm glad you mentioned that purity of heart there because you see how important a purity of heart is in applying the selfless love and respect. You have to have that purity of heart that is willing to understand and work alongside of, even though we may not entirely agree. So no matter where we turn, trouble and discord can be right around the corner. <Laugh> It's a good thing that we have Jesus to follow.

Jonathan (00:31:20): With so much possibility for issues to arise, how could we best arm ourselves against falling into these traps?

Rick (00:31:27): Again, a good question. When we just focus on the issues and potential challenges, all we see are the issues and the potential challenges. Fortunately, our example of Jesus and our reliance on God's word and application of his spirit can, if we let them, change our focus. The key here is getting out of the way long enough and often enough for God's path for us to be made clear. And Jonathan, I will give a personal testimony that the times of greatest success in my challenges in life are the times when, by God's grace, I get out of my own way. And I am telling you that changes everything. What's our next question?

Jonathan (00:32:19): What should I always bring to the table in my Christian brotherhood relationships? 1 Corinthians 13:4,6-7: "Love rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." Answers abound as to what we can do daily and practically to enhance our Christian brotherhood relationships. Selfless love and what it brings is an obvious starting point. But let's not forget the critical importance of always bringing brotherly love along with it. We will be reinforcing Romans 12:9-13 as we go to show this connection.

Rick (00:33:03): Okay, so we're going to be looking into that scripture. As a practical way to apply these things, and again, what should I always be bringing to the table in my Christian brotherhood relationships? As practical way to apply these things, we want to look at - what else - we want to look at how Jesus handled the experience of being taken prisoner in Gethsemane. Now that's a big, big event. What we will see is all of the principles of the 1 Corinthians 13:4,6-7 hat you just read, and the principles of Romans 12:9-13, which will unfold verse by verse as we go through this, all of those principles, we'll see them being applied, not necessarily in order, but being applied in a very difficult and very volatile situation, the Gethsemane experience.

Jonathan (00:33:49): And we will be quoting from a combination of the four gospels in one reading, assembling them as clearly as we can. Each part of this narrative will have a selfless love principle as its theme.

Rick (00:34:01): All right, so we're going to be quoting from Matthew 26:47-56, Mark 14:43-44 (I think it's 13 to 22--there's a misprint my paper here), Luke 22:47-53, and John 18:1-12. We're quoting from all of the four gospels together. So we're not going to give you the scripture and verse because we're putting together to see if we can get the big story. The first point from the 1 Corinthians 13 scripture: "Love rejoices with the truth," and that means selfless love is happy with God's truth being THE truth. Jonathan, let's begin our reading:

Jonathan (00:34:37): "When Jesus had spoken these words, he went forth with his disciples over the ravine of the Kidron where there was a garden in which he entered with his disciples."

Rick (00:34:48): So after preparing his disciples for his crucifixion, after all of the discussions and talk and so forth, Jesus led them to the peaceful solitude of the garden. And it said, when Jesus had spoken these words, when he had given them the truth that God had given to Jesus to expound to his disciples this night, they were brought to this place of solitude and quiet. Look, we also must, to the best of our ability, have rejoicing in truth rather than preference to be able to meet our challenges. Notice Jesus led them to the garden, even though there was danger approaching and Jesus knew it, he was before them, he brought them there. This is the way we handle the dangers that are coming into our lives. "Love rejoices with the truth." The next point is "love believes all things." And that really means love, selfless love, is faithful in all experiences. It just doesn't believe in anything, happy-go-lucky. It's faithful. That's what it means. It's faithful in all experiences. The next portion of this reading is where things get very intense very quickly. So Jonathan, let's continue:

Jonathan (00:36:02): "Now Judas also, who was betraying him, knew the place, for Jesus had often met there with his disciples. Judas then, having received the Roman cohort and officers from the chief priests and the Pharisees... And the scribes and the elders came there with lanterns and torches and swords and clubs. And the one called Judas, one of the twelve, was preceding them. Now he who was betraying him had given them a signal saying, whomever I kiss, he is the one; seize him and lead him away under guard. And he approached Jesus to kiss him. But Jesus said to him, Judas, are you betraying the son of man with a kiss? Immediately, Judas went to Jesus and said, Hail Rabbi! and kissed him. And Jesus said to him, Friend, do what you have come to do."

Rick (00:36:53): So you have this very, very emotional moment in the dark of night, this betrayal. And here's the thing, even though Jesus knew his disciple Judas would betray him, he stepped up and he met him,. and he gently challenged him. Judas, are you going to betray the son of man with a kiss? Are you going to actually do this? And he lets him do it. And then he says to him, friend, do what you've come for. You notice he calls him friend. Why? Because earlier that evening, remember in John 15, he said, you are my friends. Judas was there. You are my friends, if you do what I would have you to do. So he held to how he looked at Judas and continued to call him friend.

Jonathan (00:37:42): Talk about a pure heart. Selfless love loves all, even Judas.

Rick (00:37:48): Yeah, yeah.

Jonathan (00:37:50): Let's read Romans 12:9-10: "Let love be without hypocrisy, abhor what is evil, cling to what is good, be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Give preference to one another in honor."

Rick (00:38:04): So you look at Romans 12 and you see that "love without hypocrisy." Boy, did Jesus show that! You see "abhor that which is evil." Boy, did Jesus show that. "Cling to that which is good." Boy, did Jesus show that. What is he saying? Jesus' selfless love was pure. We also, we also must strive to bring its purity to any and all of our relationships, while always, always abhorring evil, doing the two at the same time. As Jesus stood in front of his disciples, he showed his honor for them because he stepped forward in a protective way. Do I step forward in a protective way the way Jesus did for my brotherhood?

Jonathan (00:38:45): Let me get this straight. So we are to protect the brotherhood even when they're wrong? That makes sense. Don't we want to be protected when we make a mistake? Yeah, of course we do.

Rick (00:39:00): That's such a good point. You know what Jesus said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." We do want protection. We do want that benefit of the doubt when we're making a mistake. And that's why Jesus asked Judas a question, are you doing this? Are you really doing this? He gave him the opportunity. Of course Judas didn't take it, and he stayed with the betrayal and it was a really sad thing. But you see how Jesus responded. We need to learn to respond in the way that he did with that protectiveness. So when we look at that piece of the narrative, and this love is faithful; selfless love is faithful in all things. Next, selfless "love bears all things." And remember in our last two episodes in talking about selfless love, this "bears all things" means to thatch, to cover, protect, preserve in all experiences. And that's a beautiful, beautiful example of how selfless love works. Now as we continue our reading, listen to how Jesus thatches, covers, and protects those who are following him. Jonathan, let's continue:

Jonathan (00:40:10): "So Jesus, knowing all the things that were coming upon him, when forth and said to them, Whom do you seek? They answered him, Jesus the Nazarene. He said to them, I am he. And Judas also who was betraying him, was standing with them. So when he said to them, I am he, they drew back and fell to the ground. Therefore, he again asked them, Whom do you seek? And they said, Jesus the Nazarene. Jesus answered, I told you that I am he; so if you seek me, let these go their way, to fulfill the word which was spoken, Of those whom you have given me, I lost not one."

Rick (00:40:49): This is dramatic. Jesus not only stepped forward, but he protected plainly and powerfully. He, by God's power, these people that were coming after him fell back helpless to the ground. Why? Jesus wasn't protecting himself. He was sending a message that you don't touch them, you don't touch them. I am their protector. And there's nothing that you can do to take them. Now look, we don't have that power, but we do have the responsibility to be protective. He not only stepped forward, it was through, it was plain, and it was powerful the way he protected. Now let's look at our responsibility. Romans chapter 12, let's go to now verse 11:

Jonathan (00:41:39): "Not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in the spirit, serving the Lord."

Rick (00:41:43): "Not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit." I mean, you could see Jesus being those things in that example. Is our protectiveness of our brotherhood relationships noticeable? Can somebody look at it and say, I can see that in you. I can see your dedication by how you are so caring and protective. Are we fervently caring for our brotherhood as a manifestation of our service to God? Are we? Is our love bearing, protecting in all things? The next point; "Love hopes all things." Selfless love has positive expectations in all experiences. And so when you talk about positive expectations, you need to talk about chaos. So that's where our reading brings us next:

Jonathan (00:42:29): "Simon Peter then, having a sword, drew it and struck the high priest's slave and cut off his right ear. The slave's name was Malchus. So Jesus said to Peter, Stop, no more of this. Put the sword into the sheath. For all those who take up the sword shall perish by the sword. Or do you think that I cannot appeal to my Father, and He will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels?" Well, Rick, this scene could have gotten all out of control with emotion and retribution.

Rick (00:42:59): Yeah, yeah. And when emotion takes over and you have that sense, retribution is a good word, you have that strong, strong sense, it becomes almost unbearable. It becomes almost unstoppable. And yet Jesus stops it. Even when things got out of hand, Jesus put them back in order by his focusing on what? On God's will alone. He would not let an emotional outburst hinder his fulfillment of God's will. Stop. No more of this. And the interesting thing, Jonathan, is everybody on both sides stopped. They were stopped dead in their tracks. Romans 12:12:

Jonathan (00:43:47): "Rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer."

Rick (00:43:52): "Persevering in tribulation." You see Jesus doing that so clearly here in this example. Do we selflessly and prayerfully pursue righteousness even if some of our brethren are caught up in a moment? Do we add fuel to a raging fire? Or do we diffuse the volatility with God's grace and God's power?

Jonathan (00:44:13): And it's hard not getting caught up in the moment. A text that helps me is Proverbs 15:1: "A soft answer turns away wrath."

Rick (00:44:22): Yeah. All we have to do is apply it.

Jonathan (00:44:25): <Laugh> Exactly.

Rick (00:44:26): That is all we have to do. So selfless love hopes; it has great positive expectations in all things. Next, selfless "love endures all things." And that means selfless love perseveres under the weight of all experiences. So let's finish up our reading here:

Jonathan (00:44:42): "How then will the scriptures be fulfilled which say that it must happen this way? The cup which the father has given me, shall I not drink it? And he touched his ear and healed him."

Rick (00:44:53): That's just amazing. Jesus reminded all that he would do his father's will at any and every cost. Yes, take me prisoner, but before I go, let me heal this man who was unjustly wounded, and even though he's my enemy, let me heal him. Let's look at Romans 12:13 for our application of how to be protective:

Jonathan (00:45:17): "Contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality."

Rick (00:45:21): Okay, contributing to the needs of the saints can help keeping them out of trouble. That's what he did. Are we ready, willing, and able to support our brotherly relationships in accordance with God's will no matter what the cost may be? Are we?

Jonathan (00:45:38): Could you imagine what the soldiers were thinking? What's happening here? We were knocked over, which we can't explain, and now the prisoner just healed one of us.

Rick (00:45:48): They would've been befuddled, I imagine. They're following orders, but I imagine that under their helmets, they're scratching their heads saying, this is not normal. This is not what we would've expected. But Jesus never is what people expected. What we should bring to our brotherhood relationships is the principles that Jesus brought. He did them perfectly. We do them imperfectly, but it doesn't mean we don't try. Revisiting, refocusing, and reestablishing our relationships. Where are we now?

Jonathan (00:46:16): After seeing Jesus in such a dramatic protectiveness and God-driven approach on behalf of his disciples, let us be inspired to be a positive and contributory influence with the body of Christ. We are privileged beyond our understanding to have this brotherhood. Let's live that privilege. And Rick, let's look at a practical example of how we can protect the brotherhood. How about when someone has a loved one that dies? The brethren try to huddle around those who are hurting and grieving by visiting, praying with them, bringing them meals, encouraging them with scriptures and God's promises so that they stay strong in the Lord and are able to cope with their loss.

Rick (00:46:59): It takes a lot of work to be in the brotherhood. Let's face the fact. And we need to apply ourselves beyond what we naturally would do. That's what Jesus did, and that's what we need to follow. It's such a great, great example. Jesus truly did show us how to serve and protect God's chosen ones. Now it's up to us to follow our leader no matter the cost.

Jonathan (00:47:26): Even though we can never live up to Jesus' example, what can we do to build others up, especially when they're down?

Rick (00:47:34): Because our brotherhoodhood relationships are based on God bringing us together for his work and his plan, we want to absolutely make the best of whatever circumstances we might face when one of us is down or ill or going through trials and trauma like you just explained, we want to really set our hearts and minds to simply be helpful, hopeful, and prayerful. We want to set our hearts and minds to engage in a way that a family would engage, to engage in a way that Jesus would engage. That's hard to do, but that's what we're called to do. What's our final question?

Jonathan (00:48:15): How can I contribute to my Christian brotherhood relationships, even if others seem distant or uninterested? 1 Corinthians 13:8: "Love never fails, but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away. If there are tongues they will cease. If there is knowledge, it will be done away. We have never quoted this verse in the three part series. Love never fails." This is a huge point, Rick.

Rick (00:48:43): It is. And we purposely left this verse out until the end because the idea is that selfless love always conquers. Now here's the thing; though it never fails, though selfless love never fails, we can fail it. So to help those in need, there's a number of things that we need to do. And what we want to do is list out several suggestions and put them to scripture so we can put it all in perspective. So Jonathan, where are we starting with the kinds of things to help those who may be feeling distant or discouraged or uninterested or just out of sorts?

Jonathan (00:49:22): Reassess our own sacrifice and transformation. How can I lift someone out of the mud if I'm sinking in it? Always remember selfless love, respect, and a pure heart. Romans 12:1-2: "Therefore, I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect."

Rick (00:49:58): Boy, you just said a mouthful. The idea of to help others. Let's make sure first and foremost, we are self-assessing and looking at ourselves and seeing if we are being sacrificial in our approach. Approach those who are struggling in the strength of the realization that we must always be sacrificing. Approach them with the sense of, I am wanting to lay down my life for you as Christ laid down his life for us. That's the way our approach should be, not out of our emotion or our frustration. It's out of that giving that Jesus showed us.

Jonathan (00:50:41): And we have the privilege to contribute to others who were called of God. That reminds me of this phrase or this scripture, "Verily I say unto you, in as much as ye have done it unto one of the least of these, my brethren, you have done it unto me."

Rick (00:50:58): Yeah. That just, it makes it personal. It makes it real, it makes it - this is what this is about. Our fellowship is hard because we're so different, but it's so worth it because we're so different. So let's kind of look at now, okay, we're different and all that and we've got to sacrifice. How do we develop it further? So what's next?

Jonathan (00:51:19): Realize that all of those called are on equal footing before God through Christ. 1 Corinthians 12:12-26, and we'll begin with 12-14: "For even as the body is one and yet has many members, and all the members of the body, though they are many, are one body, so also is Christ. For by one spirit we were all baptized into one body, whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free, and we were all made to drink of one spirit. For the body is not one member, but many."

Rick (00:51:53): So realize that we're called on an equal footing before Christ. So when we approach one another, we need to approach those who might be in a tough spot with encouragement and with equality. And let's remember, equality is key. We are equally called because we're equally sinful.

Jonathan (00:52:14): Rick, I was thinking about our friendship. We would've never been friends in high school. We were so different.<Laugh> I was overwhelmed in high school. I was very small and I was shy, and I went to the choir room and hid. <Laugh>Then I became, I went down the hill. I became a partier and a drinker with drugs and I turned into hiding from the world. There's no way you would've said, Hey buddy! <Laugh> How you doing?

Rick (00:52:42): Yeah, you're kind of right. I mean, look, we were both short. The problem is you grew and I didn't after that. I haven't gotten over that one yet. <Laugh> I'm just kidding. But you're right. We were very, very, very, very different back in those formative years. But what about now?

Jonathan (00:52:57): Well, our friendship in Christ is totally different, you're right. When we first met, we both had a zeal to serve the Lord and a desire to do something special that would honor the Lord, and that we had in common.

Rick (00:53:10): And we had no idea what that would be.

Jonathan (00:53:12): No, we didn't.

Rick (00:53:14): <Laugh> But we would talk about it all the time. (Yes.) And we did. So, what drew us together by God's grace was a desire to serve God and what we were personally was not of great importance. And Jonathan, that desire together has held us together with a tremendous bond through all of these years. And I'm telling you, there's no place I want to go where I don't have my brother Jonathan with me. Because it means so much to me that we can work together. And even though we have different talents and different abilities, there's an equality in Christ, and it's a beautiful thing.

Jonathan (00:53:52): Amen.

Rick (00:53:53): Amen. It's a beautiful thing. So we're looking at this equality to approach those who are having troubles. What's next?

Jonathan (00:54:00): Realize that those who play different and potentially less focused on roles are vital to the body. 1 Corinthians 12:15-17: "If the foot says, because I am not a hand, I am not a part of the body, it is not for this reason any the less a part of the body."

Rick (00:54:18): Okay so what we have here is, it's saying there's a potential resentment of those who are similar but more in a refined, doing kind of role. The foot versus the hand, they're both doers. The hand is more refined. The foot can say, oh, well, I'm not so good. So there could be a potential resentment here. Let's continue.

Jonathan (00:54:37): "And if the ear says, because I'm not an eye, I'm not a part of the body, it is not for this reason, any the less a part of the body."

Rick (00:54:45): So again, the apostle brings up another potential resentment of those in similar but more refined perception roles. You've got an ear and an eye. The eye would get all the attention, but the apostle says no, both are important.

Jonathan (00:54:58): If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole were hearing, where would the sense of smell be? This is really describing a unification, not a competition. Every member has value and we need each other.

Rick (00:55:12): We do, we do. And that's what the apostle is saying. And it's so wise in the comparison that he's making. So we need to approach those who are challenged, those of our brotherhood who are challenged, with absolute respect for whatever their part in the body is. We just respect that. And that can help to lift them out of a lethargy or a frustration or refocus them if they're having challenges with depression. We just need to move forward with those things.

Jonathan (00:55:41): And Rick, there can be a problem here. The sin of comparison is a poison.

Rick (00:55:46): Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. You have to be so, so careful. It's not about comparing, it's about being unified, like you said, not competing, but being unified instead. Good, good. Excellent. What's next?

Jonathan (00:55:58): Realize there's a grand equality and a grand individuality within the body of Christ. 1 Corinthians 12:18-20: "But now God has placed the members, each one of them in the body just as he desired. If they were all one member, where would the body be? But now there are many members, but one body." How do we show our appreciation for others? Can we do better? We should let others know that we value their qualities. We all need encouragement.

Rick (00:56:31): We do. We do. One of the things that really impresses me here in this verse is that God has placed the members, each one of them in the body, just as He desired. Who am I to look down on another that God put there just as he desired? Am I going to say to God, Hey, I'm smarter than you. I don't think I want to go there.

Jonathan (00:56:54): I wouldn't. <Laugh>

Rick (00:56:55): Well, never, never. <Laugh> Approach those who are weary with the realization that we collectively and individually are God's workmanship. Collectively and individually. And His work always ends in a masterpiece. (Love it.) It truly, truly, truly does. What's next?

Jonathan (00:57:18): Realize that those in positions of relative honor are not in any way or under any circumstance better than or exclusive from the less obvious members. 1 Corinthians 12:21-24: "And the eye cannot say to the hand, I have no need of you; or again the head to the feet, I have no need of you. On the contrary, it is much truer that the members of the body which seem to be weaker, are necessary; and those members of the body which we deem less honorable, on these we bestow more abundant honor, and our less presentable members become more presentable, whereas our more presentable members have no need of it. But God has so composed the body, giving more abundant honor to that member which lacked." Why are the weaker honored more? Because there is greater glory given to God in what He's able to do for those who lack.

Rick (00:58:17): That's a point that really needs to be focused in on. When you look at somebody who's got lots and lots of talent and they glorify God, and someone who has very, very little talent and they glorify God and they're given the same reward of being part of the body of Christ, you look at that and say, THAT guy made it?

Jonathan (00:58:35): <Laugh>.

Rick (00:58:36): And the point is, yes. God's glory shines brighter when we are weak. And that's something we need to really, really, really encourage our brotherhood with, especially when they're not in a good situation. So approach those who may feel smaller or insignificant and maybe without use by reminding them of their highly-honored position of respected need and inclusion. That's the key. They are respected, they are needed, they are included because God said so. What's next?

Jonathan (00:59:14): Realize that God's intention in setting up the body of Christ this way was and is to have a fully functioning, unified and healthy body that would always unite to accomplish the next task at hand. 1 Corinthians 12:25-26: "So that there be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it."

Rick (00:59:48): Isn't there something like the Three Musketeers, "One for all and all for one," or something like that? <laugh> Yes, there is. That's what this reminds me of. It's that sense of unity that says we're all together. There's a uniting here. So we approach those who are weary and heavy laden with the good news of not needing to feel or to be alone in their struggle. Because if you suffer, I suffer with you. If you're honored, I can be honored with you. You don't need to be alone. So when those other members of our fellowship are feeling down and out, we can reach to them and encourage them with the picture and the principles and the doctrine of the body of Christ and how we all work together. Jonathan, this is huge. This is what Christian fellowship ought to look like on a regular basis. This is not easy, but this is Christian fellowship because this is what Jesus did, and this is what we're told we need to do. So finally, revisiting, refocusing and reestablishing our relationships. Where are we ending this up?

Jonathan (01:00:55): It is hard to sum up brotherly relationships, but there's no better way than Peter doing it himself, and he does it in 1 Peter 3:8-9: "To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you are called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing."

Rick (01:01:24): That's so beautiful. Sum it up; harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, humble in spirit. "Love one another," as Jesus said, "as I have loved you." Folks, that's what we're called to do. That's what our brotherly Christian relationships should be producing. How am I doing? How am I doing in following Christ? How am I doing in following Peter and Paul? How am I doing in being selfless and pure of heart? Contribute to the brotherhood. Think about it. Folks, we love hearing from our listeners. We welcome your feedback and questions on this episode and other episodes@ChristianQuestions.com. Coming up in our next episode, "Am I Throwing Away My Life's Greatest Privilege? (Part I)". There's a lot to be said there. Talk to you next week.

Final Notes (01:02:11): copyright @2023 Christian Questions. In addition to this transcript, we provide comprehensive CQ Rewind Show Notes for every episode. They include every scripture quoted during the podcast, as well as graphics, illustrations and bonus material. Click the "CQ Rewind Show Notes" button near the audio player or sign up to receive these weekly at ChristianQuestions.com. This transcript was created using artificial intelligence. While we believe it to be accurate, we apologize for any errors that may exist.